Superbitch Magazine

I got alot of anger and piss floating through my bloodstream today and for no good reason, either. Some days I just fucking hate shit and I thank the gods above and below that I run a magazine so I can filter it all out onto the pages and sell it to everyone. It’s like therapy that you get paid to have! It’s cool. I highly recommended it. Actually, now that I think about it, I don’t…because then you would be my competition and I would have to crush you. So, don’t start a magazine…I got it covered over here. That goes the same for bands, too. Please quit forming new bands, everyone. All the good ones have already been formed and they got it down. Shhhhhh…..quiet. Calm down. I know, I know. You want to play music. I’m sorry, but you can’t. It’s not allowed. Go home and sit. Relaxxxxxx…take your medicine and go to sleep. Bye bye now.

People are fucking stupid. They don’t read anything and when they do, they don’t understand it. I’ve been trying to figure out a way to make money from this fact, and when I do, the games will officially begin. ” Where can I order your magazine? ” is probably one of the most moronic questions I’ve ever heard in my life. What YEAR is this? For jimmy’s sake, who in their right mind runs a business without a WEBSITE??? You’ve never thought to fucking google or Yahoo search the name ” Superbitch Magazine “??? Jesus H. Xmas, it’s the only magazine with that name in the entire frigging world!!! AND, if you found me online to ask me that question on myspace, why the shit can’t you see that I’ve put about 20 links straight to the website on there? What are ya…..fucking BLIND??????? You all deserve to be crushed and eaten by land-walking sharks. I feel no sympathy for you and I hope you trip and fall on your own faces while walking to the mailbox.

I’ve played music and more specifically, guitar in bands for over 25 years. I don’t anymore. I lost interest in being in bands years ago and I don’t miss it in the slightest. I still record filthy rap music under the name Beaver Shoot and sell it on itunes and amazon. I played my very last live gig in December of last year and unless I get paid lots of money and can just drive up, do the show, drink booze, collect my dough and leave, then I doubt I’ll ever play a live show again. In a few years people will just know me as the publisher of Superbitch Magazine and nobody will even remember that I used to play music….and that makes me excited and happy. The magazine and company that I’m building gives me tons of pleasure….and who the hell wouldn’t like to be holding a camera surrounded by naked girls and booze? I was BORN to do this. I get paid to swear and take pictures of boobs. …..and I’m the fucking BOSS. That means NO ONE can fire me. …..and I can smoke cigarettes in the office if I want. ….and get drunk on my lunch hour. Har-dee-fucking HAR HAR.

I’m gonna make my very first honest-to-allah PORNO this year. It’s called ” PIZZA-BRINGIN’ THROAT FUCKERS “. You get one chance to guess what the plot is about. There’ll be a Beaver Shoot soundtrack, lots of throat fucking, and humor. Jack off and laugh. I may even add a director’s commentary track where I’ll just drink jack n’ cokes be blitzed by the time the movie’s over.

Also now that I’ve moved into the new office/living quarters called SUPERBITCH HQ, I’ll be finally putting my plan to host live sex webcam shows. CLUB SUPERBITCH will be opening hopefully in a few months, and then the perverts can get their money’s worth and I’ll be directing it all from the belly of the breast. Girls are gonna be gettin’ paid, I’m gonna be gettin’ made, and shit’s gonna be goin’ down. The website is gonna need a complete rehaul soon, but I’m still trying to figure out exactly how I should make that happen. I want to sell videos, live cams, music, cds, dvds, swag, and everything else from one central place….and have girls post to their own profiles. Fuck myspace. That shit is sooooo 2004. I want fuckers to come to superbitchmagazine.com and post comments there. Myspace won’t be getting my traffic for much longer.

OK – back to work. I’m feeling calmer now. I jacked off right before I wrote this, so I think that helped too.

Goodbye and keep your pubes trim!

- DAVIES

Smut Peddler and Superbitch Magazine head nigga in charge